EMILY OWENS, MD

* 1/2 (out of ****)

 

 

Emily Owens, you know, from Emily Owens, MD, is a normal girl that’s just like all of us normal girls. She’s a little nerdy, a little neurotic, and not what you’d call traditionally hot. All of these traits serve one purpose: relatability! If we watch Emily Owens, who, again, is exactly like us, conquer her fears and save the day, that means that we can do it, too. Here’s the fucking problem. You already have to live in the head of one neurotic nutjob who overthinks shit way too much and can never be the coolest person in the world. Why would you want to live in the head of another one?

 

What the people behind this show are trying to do with Emily is evident from the start. It isn’t painful to watch because they are unsuccessful, but instead painful to watch because she is. I don’t want to watch someone like me. I want to watch someone with flaws, sure. I want them to be interesting. But what we have here is a character so weak and cloying you can’t help but root against her, something I’m sure the show’s creator would be very offended by. There’s an inner monologue for God’s sake. You don’t have to just listen to this person bitch outwardly, but also when she’s silent! When the other characters on the show are at least getting a little break from her, we’re not so lucky. By the end of the first episode, you just want to kick her down a flight of stairs and light her on fire, just to watch her burn.

 

The rest of the show is such typical hospital drivel that they must have been counting on Emily to be so likable and revolutionary that they didn’t have to figure out the rest. The only people this show has something to offer to are bullies, who will see that their effect on nerds doesn’t just go away when they grow up. Keep at it, bullies. You’re doing the lord’s work.