Flickchart’s Greatest Battles

 In which we pit two movies together using flickchart.com, debating their merits or lack thereof.

Spaceballs

VS

Groundhog Day

Bill Murray is going up against Mel Brooks who co-wrote, acted as two characters, and directed? Okay, time for a fair and just comparison… I’m rooting for you, Bill.

Groundhog Day is a film you (maybe) see once a year, edited and censored on PBS, and your mom is very excited to watch it with you. It’s about a guy who I can relate to, but then turns his life around for the “better,” after living in an endless loop of Groundhog Day. It’s quite depressing to see him live the same day over and over again, and because of Murray’s brilliant acting, you empathize; so when he decides to commit suicide (multiple times), one understands and doesn’t judge his actions. Hell, I don’t go through the same shitty day and I feel like eating a bullet on the regular. If I remember correctly, the first time he tries to kill himself, he steals the groundhog and drives off a cliff. I was really upset that he couldn’t finish the job. Someone feeling enough pain to actually go through offing yourself and you wake up the next morning to Sonny and Cher… I couldn’t imagine a worse hell. Eventually he uses his “immortality” to learn a bunch of cool things, hang out with ladies, and to act in a way that doesn’t recognize consequences as part of life. A great film, it really is. But at the end of the movie it seems like he experiences genuine joy; this is where the film becomes really confusing and I cannot relate.

To be honest, Mel Brooks is enough to win a Flickchart battle, but when you add a dash of Star Wars to the mix… Okay, let’s “objectively” look at one of the greatest parodies ever written. It’s fun, it’s got a happy ending, and it’s very quotable, but not quoted by every asshole wearing a collared polo. (See: “Yeah baby!”, “I’m Rick James, bitch!”, or anything from Anchorman.) I would expand upon this more, but it’s my belief that if you haven’t seen Spaceballs, you should. And if you thought Spaceballs was stupid, how’s it feel to be dead wrong? Re-evaluate your life choices.

“No, sir! I didn’t see you playing with your dolls again!” Sorry Bill, you were doomed from the start. Maybe next time we’ll see how Ghostbusters fairs in glorious battle!-TA

WINNER:

Spaceballs (1987)

ROUND TWO

Die Hard

VS

2001: A Space Odyssey

Really, this is a battle over instant gratification or a thought piece. Watching one makes you feel smart, the other makes you feel pitifully stupid. So what shall we go on, here? Die Hard is cultural phenomenon that some girls have to hear about over and over again ’cause their boyfriend is a god damn Bruce Willis super fan. It has spawned four sequels that span over 25 years and gave the world the phrase, “Yipee-ka-yay, mother fucker” which is great for all kinds of situations: business meetings, Thanksgivings at your Aunt Carol’s house, baby-showers and the like. It’s a fun movie about an underdog pulling one over on the (Germans? Russians? I dunno, some European nation that has given us trouble over the last half century and also has menacing accents) and saving a skyscraper full of people. The other is an incredible piece of art from one of the weirdest and most brilliant directors of all time that really says something about what it means to be a human. It journeys through eons and looks at our humanity’s connection to the technological world, our tools, and its implications are never ending. You have to watch it a couple of times to even begin to grasp at what its meaning might be.  It’s an important movie that anyone serious about movies should see.-SR

WINNER:

2001: A Space Odyssey