Memories sure are a funny thing. The funny thing about memories is that they are all bullshit lies. If you don’t believe me go look up all the girls you dated in high school and tell me they were lovable. No, they weren’t, were they? But just like that pizza-faced girl that couldn’t shut up about Titanic seemed to age a little better with time, some things get a little popularity boost in your mind just because they’re all shiny and new. What are the two highest rated movies of all time, according to a giant collective internet rating system? Why, two movies that came out within the past three years, of course. Also, both were directed by Christopher Nolan. So its a hypothetical clash of the titans. A throw down between the 1972 Dolphins and Atilla the Hun – and its not even half-time yet. Its a damned close call, too. Mostly because they were directed by the same guy. It’s also why I love and hate all the same things about these movies. They are both well acted and well shot. They use effects tastefully and evoke emotions well. They also have no goddamned plot. Here’s a quick exercise. Pretend you’re talking to some random person who hasn’t seen Inception or The Dark Knight and try to explain the sequence of events in one of these movies to them. See? The joker’s random twisting scheme kind of falls apart when you strip away the explosions and Maggie Gyllenhaal’s weird-ass face. Unless the hidden message of The Dark Knight is that the Joker is God it would be really hard for him to plan all that shit out. And Inception has so many dreams within dreams that it kind of distracts you from the fact that there’s a lot of loose ends not being tied up there. So in the end he lives with his kids in a dream-or-is-it, but there’s still some weird corporation that totally wants him dead and probably knows where his kids have been hanging out. Both movies are good, but I can’t help but feel like they’re using a lot of flash to cover up the fact that the actual story they’re telling is kind of shitty. Anyways, The Dark Knight wins because fucking Batman, that’s why. I just wanted to point out that maybe the best movie ever isn’t whatever the most recent popular one was. Please spread this message to the people who voted The Social Network all the way up to number 10.-DT