POP FILTER

VS.

THE CLASSICS OF 1979

ESCAPE FROM ALCATRAZ

Based off the famous prison break, Escape From Alcatraz stars Clint Eastwood as Frank Morris and Patrick McGoohan as the warden. It’s a mood piece, so if you’re looking for witty remarks and a dialogue based adventure, this may not be for you; if you are able to enjoy the slow burn, check out Netflix Instant before it mysteriously disappears from your Playstation 3, Wii, or laptop. If you are reading this and you’re upset it’s no longer there, just remember, you don’t pay for your friend’s Netflix Instant account anyways. Thief.

On a related note, never in your life will you root for the bad guy more than this movie. The film makes prison seem like all the criminals (except Wolf) are pretty nice guys. I doubt that was the case. Regardless I know Clint makes it out, because he’s in my room right now.

(He guards me while I sleep.)

Before a word is said in the film, Clint hangs dong. After everything is safely packed away, the first line of dialogue is spoken, “Welcome to Alcatraz.”

Not too long into the movie, Wolf is going to try and touch Clint in the no-no spots, to which Wolf is swiftly reprimanded. “Wolf! No, Wolf! Bad!” Except Clint doesn’t say that, he sucker punches him and shoves a bar of soap in the mouth. Personally, I was hoping for a deathblow, but Morris (Clint) isn’t a killer. One could only suspect that if someone actually tried to do that to Mr. Eastwood, he wouldn’t be a “he” for much longer.

McGoohan plays a jerk very well. He takes away Doc’s painting privileges, which leaves Doc with little else to live for. “Mr Zimmerman! Can you come over here a minute?” Without hesitation, Doc chops off his fingers. No scream, no terror, as if to say, “when you took away my painting, you took away my life. And my reason to live. Let me show you.” *Chop* At the start of this scene, you feel an ominous presence in the room with you, so if your imagination is as warped as mine, you’re thankful that it was as tame as that. I was expecting something along the lines of dragging his own neck across shattered glass; at least that’s what the presence in the room was suggesting for me to do. Throughout the film, this scene is referenced and McGoohan is able to show such apathy that it makes teenage goth girls seem loving and warm. Another reason to why the loveable cast of repeat offenders stays lovable.

This is a good film, it’s mostly buildup, short climax, and no resolution. I can write most of the substance of the plot points, but the truth is that this piece needs to be experienced to be understood. I believe that it’s worth watching once, if you don’t think it’s great, fine, but you won’t feel like you wasted your time. It’s not necessarily something that you want to watch over and over again, but chances are you already have seen it, but forgot about it. I was positive that I’ve never seen it before, as I have never heard of the title. I was so positive that when I told Gabe Cordova that I’ve never seen it, he went on about how I failed as a person. Less than a minute into the film, I not only remembered that I’ve seen it, but I remembered damn near everything about it. It’s a story that plays off your heart, not your memory. For someone who has “never heard of [Escape From Alcatraz],” I was able to recall a very specific moment of Larry Hankin crying, because he couldn’t man up and escape. The three others did, and now Clint protects the things I hold dear in my home.-TA