SUCK MY DISC

The DVD releases for the week of December 5th, 2011

 

 

MR. POPPER’S PENGUINS

** (out of ****)

Jim Carrey acting like a child is something we’ve all seen time and time again. However, this is most effective when he is acting like a child in a world meant to be viewed by adults. Carrey’s antics can have hilarious outcomes if they are juxtaposed to the world we as adults (at least age wise) live in. Basically, I’m saying he is at his best in PG-13 or R rated movies, and Mr. Popper’s Penguins being PG results in less then Carrey’s best.

 

 

“But Kyle, what about The Mask and How the Grinch Stole Christmas? Those were good PG Jim Carrey movies!” Sure, sure, they’re are always exceptions, but in both those movies Carrey was literally a cartoon character. His hijinks were preformed in worlds they weren’t trying to be reality. Plus, they might be good movies (depending on one’s taste), but they really aren’t his best, now are they?

 

All this aside, Mr. Popper’s Penguins is a children’s movie, thus, I believe is unfair to solely judge against prior Carrey movies. Now, I enjoy kids films as much as the next guy, probably even more to be honest. Kids movies are an escape, a place I can go to watch a fun adventurous film free of my jaded perspective on films. With that said, I still hold kids films to a standard as well. Does Popper’s hold up as a kids film. Does it meet my standard? Not really.

Mr. Popper’s Penguins is by no means the worst PG movie ever, but it’s NO WHERE near the best. Much of the humor within the film comes from a place I would hope even nine year olds would be above in this day in age. With in the first ten minutes of the film Popper get’s hit right in the testicles. Also, poops and farts are running gags (no pun intended) throughout most of the movie.

This type of humor would be fine if it was the type of film that really allowed for it, however, Mr. Popper’s Penguins is supposed to be about a man learning to appreciate what he has in life through the taking care of penguins. I’m fairly certain the dick and fart jokes could have been left out and the film would have had a slightly clearer message.

Though the movie did have many sideline characters which were enjoyable. It was almost artistic to watch Mr. Popper’s “P” popping assistant Pippi manipulate each of her sentences to have as many p’s as possible. This combined with her english accent creates a fun character I wish we saw more of. Even the clerk at the lobby where Popper lived was quite funny. Constantly trying the squeeze more tips from Popper by keeping quiet about the 6 flightless bird in his apartment became even more funny as the situation became more and more ludicrous. Although, the appearance from David Krumholtz as the nosey neighbor seem extremely pointless and/or misused.

 

The one last thing I would like to bring up, is the fact that the ex-wife’s new boyfriend gets the crappy end of the stick in the movie. I’m tired of movies where the ex-wife’s overly nice new boyfriend gets screwed by the old husband coming back and rekindling their old relationship. I’m sorry Popper, but your time has past, the new boyfriend should get a fair chance.

Over all Mr. Popper’s Penguins could be an okay film to be forced to sit through if you have children. It’s definitely on the bottom tier as far as Carry’s career goes. I just wish children’s movies didn’t always have to resort to hitting in the balls and pooping on someone, to get the laughs. Mr. Popper’s Penguins did have ball hitting and pooping, a lot of it, but it also had some clever moments as well.- KM

THE DEBT

**1/2 (out of ****)

In the early 60’s, a group of three spies for the Mossad, capture and kidnap a gynecologist who used to be knows as the Surgeon of Birkenau, a Nazi responsible for killing and torturing thousands of Jews. Today, those three spies are being honored because of a book about their lives is about to be released, a book whose author’s parents are two of the three spies. But, much like every movie ever, all is not what it seems. The Debt doesn’t have a ton to offer besides these secrets and lies, so I won’t reveal them here, but I will say that the performances and direction keep it all tight, if not amazing, especially if you can through a slow first thirty minutes or so. It’s not exactly what I would call realistic, but it does spare you from obligatory action scenes and easy answers to the questions it asks. But in the end it lacks a focus that keeps it from greatness. There’s a love triangle and a Nazi to take care of and a botched mission and growing paranoia and the reasons for being a soldier and a tremendous lie, each one a plotline interesting in it’s own right, but much too much to take on, especially in a movie that’s content to display a feel of B-movie thriller. – RH

 THE HANGOVER PART II

*1/2 (out of ****)

Fans of the PopFilter podcast know that every week we decide to cut one of the segments on the show for no other reason than the segment was awful. This week’s podcast lost the segment that covered The Hangover Part II because fuck this movie. Normally I would just put a link to the podcast here, but I can’t, because that segment will never be heard. Anyway, let’s get this over with. Three friends got drunk and bad shit happened. Whether you have seen The Hangover, and therefore have basically seen this movie, or your new to The Hangover epic, there’s nothing new or redeeming or interesting or funny here. The Help has more laughs, although I have no idea why I would compare it with that movie. – RH

THE HELP

*** (out of ****)

In mid-sixties Jackson, MS, a progressive white girl named Skeeter (hillbillies! Is there anything they won’t name Skeeter?) graduates college and moves back home. She is a writer looking for her first subject, and she finds it in Abeliene and Milly, AKA the help. Skeeter is starting to realize that although her friends and family have nailed the separate, they still have some work to do on the equal. And the best way to change the situation back then if you’re one white girl and a couple of black girls is write a book. Tate Taylor, who allegedly got this job because he was childhood best friends with the author it’s based on, has competency in spades. You will most likely laugh, cry, and be grossed out in all of the places he wants you to. It’s as manipulative as shit pie (that’s a Southern phrase), and you can see the strings the entire time, but for the most part you don’t care. This is mostly due to the lead performances, and no I’m not talking about Emma Stone. I have made it abundantly clear on this website, and this website’s podcast, that I have an unhealthy, Jim Carrey-like obsession for Ms. Stone, but here she’s not given much to do. It’s the actual leads, Viola Davis and Octavia Spencer that gives this movie it’s brains, heart, and nuts, as if their some sort of Wizard of Oz, attempting to save it from TV-movie land. In general there’s a TV feel to this movie. There are so many characters and plotlines, and there isn’t a fierce “and then” plot structure, that the movie feels more like the first three episodes of a halfway decent show on TNT, as opposed to movie preparing for awards season.But halfway decent is better than pie shit, and if you want to get started with the awards movies, this is a nice, Hollywoody place to start. – RH

ALSO RELEASED:

COWBOYS AND ALIENS

NEW TO BLU RAY

PORTLANDIA

The most tweelightfully hipster thing I’ve ever liked, if for no other reason it attempts to be hip as it puts hipsters in their place, or as I call it, hipsterbation. Fred Armisen is rarely not a delight, but the real surprise here is Carrie Brownstein, who must have honed her comedic chops while in the band Sleater-Kinney, much like so many other comediennes before her. The two work really well together, and have a good idea of how long skits are supposed to last. It’s a quick, six episode season that should have got more play when it aired on IFC, a channel that gets no play. – RH

SCARY MOVIE TRIPLE FEATURE

The Scary Movie series gets a bad rap, but at this point, the only other place we have to go for broad, Zucker-style parody are the Friedberg/Seltzer Epic Movies, which are as roughly as funny as my daughter’s funeral was. To call this trilogy hit-and-miss would be a misnomer; hit-and-miss-and-miss-and-miss would be more accurate. It’s also a parody of a movie that itself was a parody, if just a little more subtle, but whatever. They feature Anna Faris, who always finds a way to rise above whatever she’s in, which she has to do, because she is exclusively in crap.- RH

NEW TO TVD

 

CAPTAIN POWER AND THE SOLDIERS OF THE FUTURE

For those of you too young to know what this is, let me see if I can explain this incredible dollop of batshit insanity. Captain Power and the Soldiers of the Future was a TV show in the late eighties. It was put on in timeslots that would normally feature Bugs Bunny and Smurfs. This show, however, was basically about how an alien race of Hitlers felt all of Earth was Jewish, and Holocausted our ass. Captain Power was our last line of defense. From what I can remember, this show was dark and baffling, and way above my head. What wasn’t above my head though was that the show also had a line of toys to go along with it. Not that surprising, right? The difference was that these toys were necessary. Not necessary like all kids think all toys are necessary, but necessary as in the toys you had to buy were interactive with the show. You see, these badguy-Nazi-alien-borg mother fuckers were going to come through your TV. When you purchased the toy, which was basically a jet in the shape of a laser in the shape of a laser jet, you could fire at the badguys through your TV. The badguys shot back, though, so when you got hit, a little man would fly out of the cockpit on the top of your laser. And of course, all of that was just bullshit they were feeding to idiot kids, because TV characters can’t shoot at you, dumbass. The scheme is over, and with the reign of shooting laser planes at your TV mercifully short lived, now you can just kick back and appreciate what the show has to offer on its own. – RH

THE SIMPSONS: THE FOURTEENTH SEASON

I know you think this show is currently the worst thing to ever be on television, and that it should have been canceled thirty seconds into the second episode of the first season. I know that each episode that has come out over the last ten years (including all of these) pisses on the grave of seasons 3-7. But just for a minute, let’s just breathe, relax, and then actually watch this. Not bad, right? Not perfect, but maybe not worth all of the nonstop bitching and moaning you’re capable of. This season definitely has its moments, with the strongest episode the last of the season, in which Moe (of course) saves Maggie’s life, and the becomes obsessed with her. The episodes individually begin to lose their focus faster and faster here, and some of the plotlines are completely bonkers. I’ve always been on Team “It’s Still Better than Most of What’s on TV”, as opposed to Team “Cancel it NOW!!!”, and there’s still some interesting things going on, particularly involving the Simpson’s always complicated relationship with religion. – RH