THIS WEEK IN NERD

In which Ashley breaks down nerdier corners of pop culture.

This week in nerd I’m covering issues #138 and #139 of the popular X-men comic book storyline, Days of Future Past. Days of Future Past was first published, written and illustrated by comic book greats Chris Claremont, Josh Byrne and Terry Austin in 1980 by Marvel Comics and is part of The Uncanny X-men (issues #138-143). It is currently #25 on the list of Marvel’s greatest comics of all time.

Issue #138 starts out with the original X-men, Professor X, Wolverine, Storm, Colossus, and Nighcrawler standing over Jean Grey’s tombstone at her funeral. Pretty depressing, huh? Well, for those of you who know how Marvel operates, fret not – you’ll see her again. For those who don’t line up every Wednesday at your local comic book store for new issues, this issue explains who the original X-men are and how they came to be, and the sob story that is Cyclops and Jean Grey. The story then continues to reminisce about The Brotherhood of Mutants (prime adversary of the X-men – includes Magneto, Scarlet Witch, Quicksilver, Toad, and Mastermind) and the Juggernaut, who is Professor Xavier’s half-brother.

After all of this catch-up, we are finally introduced to Bolivar Trask, the creator of the gigantic mutant-hunting robots also known as Sentinels. Trask and his a-hole robots are a big part of the Days of Future Past plot…remember that bit.

Shit gets cray in the future past.

 Anyway, I’ll shorten the rest of this issue for you because it’s super boring: Professor X dies, Cyclops finds his brother Alex (Havok), Alex gets kidnapped, Bolivar Trask dies, Trask’s son, Larry picks up where he left off by being an evil little shithead, the X-men literally send the Sentinels into the sun by outsmarting them, Professor X comes back from the dead (he faked his death), Angel and Dr. Hank Mccoy leave the X-men, Hank turns into the blue Beast, the X-men recruit some new mutants (Nightcrawler, Storm, Wolverine, Colossus, Thunderbird, Banshee, and Sunfire), Thunderbird dies when they fight an actual island (Krakoa), the Sentinels return under the control of a government nutjob named Stephen Lang, X-men almost die in a space battle with the Sentinels, Jean turns into the Phoenix, Phoenix saves the universe, the X-men help the Canadian mutant team (Alpha Flight)…. moving on, Kitty Pryde is recruited by the X-men and, finally, Phoenix turns evil and explodes. This brings us back to her funeral, Cyclops leaves the X-men, and now cut scene to after the funeral. Whew.

Issue #139 starts out with Storm, Colossus, Angel, Nightcrawler, and Wolverine training in the X-men’s “Danger Room”, which simulates battles and training exercises. As if fighting bad guys on a daily basis isn’t enough. Professor X and Kitty Pryde are in the control room observing Angel’s lack of fighting skill. At this point, I’m actually more entertained that they call Nightcrawler’s brimstone disappearing smoke thing, “BAMF”. The X-men finally defeat the danger room scenario when Storm summons some rain to short circuit the power control.

X-Men has always been the comic willing to put its heroes in stupid outfits.

The young Kitty Pryde is freaked out by the Nightcrawler’s blue devilish good looks (see what I did there). Professor X gives Kitty a little pep talk about being a superhero and then suggests she take on a code name. The team decides on the name “Sprite”, which is a seriously dumb name on the account that she can walk through walls…not flit through the forest and frolic with woodland creatures. The conversation then changes to Wolverine mentioning that he left Canada’s premiere fighting team, Alpha Flight, without their blessing and then tells Prof X that he and Nightcrawler are going back to straighten things out.

Now we follow Wolverine and Nightcrawler to Canada, where they’re waiting at Heather and James MacDonald Hudson’s (a.k.a. Vindicator) house. Meanwhile, Vindicator is meeting up with Shaman and Snowbird (members of Alpha Flight) to discuss a missing person case involving a family of four, with some curious undertones. Wolverine and Nightcrawler show up and almost start a fight. Vindicator then brings the conversation back to the case, and suggests that a bear ate them. Oh silly Canadians. Wolverine then takes a turn for the dramatic and says that a mythical legend called ate them… THE WENDIGO. The Wendigo was a man transformed by sorcery into a beast that consumes human flesh. Then Wolverine does what any rational superhero would do – he volunteers to help Alpha Flight track down and exterminate the Wendigo. Nightcrawler runs to the car to get his gear and is distracted by a beautiful sunset, when the Wendigo decides to attack him.

What happens next?? Will Nightcrawler make it out alive? Find out what happens to The Uncanny X-men and Alpha Flight in the next article of… This Week in Nerd!-AK